My Rating: 4 out of 5
"She was mine. I owned her soul…until Death stole her heart."
Leif is a novella from the Existence series. It is glimpses into Leif's point-of-view during both Existence and Predestined.
While reading this I couldn't recall how I felt about Leif in Predestined. I liked him enough in Existence, but just in a Puck or Matt (TVD) sort of way. I had to reread my reviews to remind myself. Apparently I hated Leif after Predestined. Now I kind of feel bad for hating him. And I also felt bad for how much Pagan clearly hated him. He so didn't deserve it. He definitely made a lot of mistakes and went about trying to woo her all wrong, and he lied to her too much. But can you imagine being any better after having the parents he has? No, he is lucky he turned out so good. And he really loves her. When Pagan was in Vilokan during Predestined and she told Leif that if he loved her he wouldn't hold her against her will, I agreed with her. But now I see he was telling her the truth. He was doing his best to protect her from his father, hoping she would choose him, but he never intended to force her to.
In most love-triangles I still like the other guy and wish he could be happy, but do not want him to move on because I still admire his feelings and don't want his love to be cheapened by being forgotten too quickly. Such as Puck. He still loved Meghan in the end and says he is leaving for decades in order to get over her. If he had found another girl in the end I would have been disappointed in him. There are a few instances when I found the other guy to be just an annoyance and a distraction and I could care less if he fell for someone else, in fact I would prefer it, such as Will Herondale. I know, I know, I am alone in that, but that is a discussion for another day. That is how I used to feel about Leif, but now he has switched to the other category. He tried so hard to win Pagan that it is unforgettable, and I don't want him to forget it either. I don't know if that is unfair of me, but as I said, I feel like his love would be cheapened otherwise, affecting how I view his character.
But I wish more had been covered from Existence. The last scene was when they made out on her couch (which was super hot from Leif POV btw), then it skipped to the end when she picked Dank. But when did Leif realize that Pagan was in love with Dank? Did he know she was in love with him all along? Did he realize that his kisses hadn't ever excited her? We don't know. I wouldn't mind having another book about Leif. One that isnt just Pagan's story from his POV, but a book that is actually his story and his HEA.